Last Time Syndrome

So I’m sitting here on my back porch soaking up some sunshine musing over the fact that I’ve only got 3 and a half weeks left in Philly. I keep experiencing this feeling that I’m going to refer to as “last time syndrome”. It’s a peculiar pre-nostalgic emotion that is invoked anytime I think: This is the last time I’ll eat at this restaurant. This is the last time I’ll shop at this place. This is the last time I’ll ride the subway on the Broad Street line. And so on… It’s also about the people I’m going to leave behind. It’s emotional to tell friends that I’m moving away but with 21^st century technology it’s easy to keep in touch all over the world.

So what is this about?! It isn’t like I’ve been banished and can never come back to ride the subway, make a quick stop at WAWA, shop at the mall or eat a Chick-fil-A chicken sandwich.

It’s more than all that.

I experienced this same strange feeling before I had to say goodbye to all my study abroad friends two years ago. It’s a mixture of sadness and joy because you realize how great of a time you are having surrounded by people you enjoy spending time with, but inevitably it is coming to an end. You have to accept that you will never be in this moment, in this place, with these particular people again. (Rereading that sentence I realize my point could be argued because of course you can return to a place with the same person… but it will still be different. The people will be a bit older, the scenery might have changed and your memories will influence the place.)

I think our brains tend to organize our thoughts into compartments and when we are looking forward to something like a big trip, we focus on it so much that we forget about the other compartments, like the place we are in right NOW.

Focusing on where you are CURRENTLY and the people you are with is the most important part of traveling. Living in the now is the best way to be able to wake up and enjoy every day so that you don’t live in a depressed state in the in-between trips when you are broke, saving up, and trying not to go out in order to pay for that plane ticket you booked a few months back.

So it’s okay to look forward to an exciting trip and even count down the days, but to not get overwhelmed by “last time syndrome” it’s important to take time to enjoy the little details of where you are right now, in this moment, so you don’t miss out on the beauty around you.

Who knows, someone might be counting down the days until they get to travel where you are now!  😉

Farewell Philly

The official countdown to my next destination begins TODAY. It is exactly ONE MONTH until I leave for Ireland!! Excitement does not fully explain the happiness I feel about this decision.  Instead of joining the mad rush for finding a job in the highly competitive job market of recent graduates in Philly, I’m packing my bags and heading off to Europe.

Having just graduated college in May, I am raring to go begin the next chapter in my life.

Truthfully, Ireland isn’t a new destination for me. I was born in Northern Ireland and grew up in the U.S.

I am 100% Irish but am equal parts American and Irish having grown up in the States. It’s often difficult to categorize myself because when I’m in America my friends view me as Irish but when I’m in Ireland, I’m viewed as American because of my accent. I guess I understand that home really is a fluid word and I’m lucky enough to have two homes: Ireland AND the U.S.

Over the years growing up, my family went home for a month in the summer to visit the rest of our family and do some sightseeing so we could see where we came from. My sister and I always enjoyed hearing ancient Celtic myths and legends. We’ve kissed the Blarney Stone, climbed over the Giant’s Causeway, explored Dublin and wandered around Cork’s picturesque cobblestone streets.

I absolutely love the country and the people and am really excited to return to live in a permanent capacity, instead of my previous trips as a visitor on vacation or as a student studying abroad.

I am lucky to call myself Irish and American, especially in a world where there is so much conflict and countries in chaos. I’ve gotten to live in two amazing countries that offer their people freedom, democracy, and beautiful sights… Any of my fellow travelers experience belonging to two places at once?  It’s definitely not a bad thing, and brings me that much closer to being a true citizen of the world.

It will definitely be an emotional farewell to all my wonderful friends here in Philly but I can feel it in my bones that its time for me to move on and explore new things. The travel bug was sparked long ago and wanderlust runs in my veins as my parents were also frequent globetrotters to England, Holland, France, Germany, Spain, Greece, Portugal, Bulgaria and of course the U.S.

Moving to Ireland is only the beginning of a very lengthy and busy next couple of years. My twenties is going to be EPIC. I ‘m eager to try out many places over the course of my lifetime. I am ambitious and curious enough to step out of my comfort zone and plan to try living in Australia (tentatively 2016?), London (tentatively 2017?) and Spain one day.

I feel a combination of excitement and stress now that my departure date is not far away. I still have so much packing and sorting to do before I leave, but I know that this is the beginning of a great adventure!